Should ex-spouses ever remarry once they’ve divorced? Says one ex-spouse, “There’s a reason why they’re your ex. Put them where they belong — in the rearview mirror. Move forward and leave the past behind.”
On the other hand, it depends on why you divorced in the first place and why you are considering remarrying. If you believe that your spouse has magically changed and that things will somehow work out, then don’t remarry. If you can’t sort out why you divorced in the first place or what went wrong, then don’t remarry. If you expect that your spouse is going to somehow “save” you or support you or otherwise fulfill all your needs, then don’t remarry. That didn’t happen the first time around and it won’t happen the second time either.
If, on the other hand, you have matured and understand what went wrong, accept that (at least in most cases) two of you played a role in the marriage’s failure and you are ready to take responsibility for your own part in a union, here are some reasons why you might consider remarrying.
Time may indeed heal all wounds. The hurt heals over time and exes might begin to remember all the good times they shared together. Another reason that two people decide to remarry is that they are now ready to fully commit to the marriage. They may have spent years apart and now have a different perspective on their roles in what went “wrong” with the marriage in the first place. They may have more maturity and be ready to take responsibility for their part in the partnership, and not expect the other person to magically make everything perfect all the time.
Exes may have caught on that love isn’t necessarily a noun, but it is a verb, a practice, sort of like running or exercising or brushing your teeth. You need to pay attention to it and work at it for it to work. Exes may be ready for that approach to their love.
The couple may have been divorced for some time now and they may realize that there really isn’t someone else out there who’s better for them. And sometimes, co-parenting children without the conflict that was hot and heavy during the marriage can bring couples together again.
Forgiving one another is a process that takes some time, but once it happens the anger dissolves and you can begin to experience love again. And sometimes, surprisingly, it is your ex who you want to spend the rest of your life with — again!
But you may also want to obtain a pre-nup, just in case. . .
Contact the Law Office of Len Conner & Associates
At the Law Office of Len Conner & Associates, we offer a free initial consultation in all family law matters, including issues relating to remarrying your ex. Send us an e-mail or call our office at (972) 445-1500 or (817) 288-4168 if you’re in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. Or call us toll free at (877) 613-5800 for an appointment.
